{"id":169,"date":"2015-02-11T00:32:41","date_gmt":"2015-02-11T00:32:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/?p=169"},"modified":"2015-02-11T05:21:29","modified_gmt":"2015-02-11T05:21:29","slug":"cows-cane-toads-chickens-and-chicks","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/?p=169","title":{"rendered":"Cows, Cane Toads, Chickens and Chicks"},"content":{"rendered":"

COWS, CANE TOADS, CHICKENS AND CHICKS (12.3.2008)<\/strong><\/p>\n

Well it\u2019s been just over a month now, since Maria moved in to my joint and it\u2019s been interesting, to say the least. She\u2019s a great girl and we still get-on magnificently \u2013 though so far, our opinions only match on two subjects \u2013 abortion and the fact that neither of us like to watch wrestling! These two subjects were cause for high-fives, as we usually debate every other social, political, religious or moral issue. Maria is not altogether against enjoying an occasional alcoholic beverage and since, for the time being, she is unemployed and not too overwhelmed with uni work, she sometimes cracks a cold one late in the afternoon. I sometimes join her, though usually not on school-nights, and we sit out the back and discuss important global issues. Maria, it seems, has a huge social conscience, partly due to her political and aboriginal studies at University, and partly due to her bohemian-hippie spiritual slant. I, on the other hand, have a very practical mind and often depend on simple analysis such as motive, purpose and payoff. I realise I cannot change the world, so I simply refuse to spend any emotion on such matters. Mostly, this results in me remaining calm and presenting my case in a steady and direct voice, while Maria gets very excited and emotional, lecturing me in an Adolf Hitler type performance complete with commitment and physical gestures. I\u2019m not sure if this has anything to do with her Greek heritage, but she is easily wound-up \u2013 which leads to another little quirky and unexpected result. Whenever Maria gets excited or emotional, the little sausage-dog, Annie, starts licking my feet! I think it is her attempt to calm things down and while I appreciate the sentiment, it really is quite a revolting response.<\/p>\n

\"Maria\"<\/a>
Maria<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Maria\u2019s care for the world and all the people in it is certainly something to admire and respect \u2013 but in all practicality, she\u2019s wasting a lot of time and emotion for unachievable aims. One recent debate I recall was regarding cows and their production of methane gas. Now, when she does eat, Maria is a vegetarian \u2013 not because she believes this is the healthiest way to live, but because she feels too sorry for the animals to eat meat. Chicken soup remains a controversial menu item and fish is okay thus far, but beef, lamb and especially pork (as they are closest to humans \u2013 she often quotes the DNA percentage we have in common), are definitely off limits.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m a carnivore who occasionally eats some green and orange stuff, though I love fruit. She doesn\u2019t like fruit but loves vegetables.<\/p>\n

Anyway, she correctly claims that hard-hoofed animals such as beef cattle (we live in the Northern Territory, who supply half the world with beef) harm the natural environment and change the landscape \u2013 not to mention the excessive methane gas created by great herds of cattle! Which I am enthusiastically advised, is one of the worst culprits currently contributing to the global warming phenomenon! She claims we should get rid of all the cattle in Australia and treat the land like the Aborigines did \u2013 with sustainable respect! My argument is that this style of living was only possible due to their small numbers and nomadic habits. If we did kill all Australian cattle, half the world\u2019s population would perish due to starvation \u2013 we have long been committed to this path and there are far too many people in the world now, to so radically change direction. This logically leads to the next subject which heartless carnivores such as myself seem to support and promote \u2013 international exporting of live cattle\u2026.on disgusting, cramped, unhygienic, inhumane livestock ships!<\/p>\n

It makes for great entertainment, winding her up and letting her go over a couple of beers.<\/p>\n

Like the time I mentioned the eggs, just for kicks.<\/p>\n

I said \u2013 \u201cI see in the fridge you bought half a dozen free-range eggs? I\u2019ve got some eggs there too\u2026..\u201d<\/p>\n

Before I could finish, as I expected, she was lecturing me on buying only free-range eggs, they taste better, they\u2019re not full of hormones \u2013 how would I like to be stuck in a cage with a broken beak and never let out and pumped full of hormones all day and not be able to move? She offered to pay the difference if I was still so committed to buying the cheaper eggs \u2013 \u2018cause you can\u2019t do that to chickens and they\u2019re much better anyway!<\/p>\n

When she finished, I said \u201cAs I was saying, I get my eggs straight from the farm, where the chickens run wild all day \u2013 so feel free to eat them if you like\u201d.<\/p>\n

I often offer her half of my steak for tea and she offers me half of her Lentil-slop. We get on so well together, I love having Maria around \u2013 but alas, she\u2019s looking for her own place. Willing to pay up to $750 a week rent, so she shouldn\u2019t have too much trouble. I could rent her my place and I\u2019ll move into a $200 a week unit!<\/p>\n

Maria also offered me an interest free loan, to be paid back whenever \u2013 so I could go on holidays down south with the rest of my family at Easter. I\u2019d love to go and I really appreciate her offer, but I had to turn it down. She got the shits with me \u2013 something about stupid male pride\u2026.<\/p>\n

\"Los<\/a>
Los Amigos – Me, Maria, Kirstin<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Maria went out with her cousin and friends last Saturday night and Kirstin came round for a visit with her little baby, Rocky, and a sack full of Chinese food. We polished off a couple of bottles of wine (she brought a portable cot and monitor for the young fella). Unfortunately, Rocky\u2019s routine is all mixed up and he\u2019s running on nocturnal hours for the most part. However, he was asleep on Kirstin in the early hours of the morning, when his mother spotted a cane toad hopping round my back yard.<\/p>\n

\"Me<\/a>
Me & Rocky<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

This is the first such sighting in my backyard \u2013 though they\u2019ve been marching North by West from Queensland for many years now \u2013 the noxious little mongrels! So we ran outside and she pointed the scurrying little rascal out and I chased him down, like only the ultimate predator to which we\u2019ve evolved, could do. I grabbed him and studied his phiz, just to confirm his specie before terminating him, but Kirstin requested I not do him any harm in her presence. Not wanting a poison-secreting abomination bouncing round among my frozen steak and chicken, I simply lobbed him over the fence and into next-door\u2019s saltwater pool. I figured since these monstrosities are unable to climb vertical walls, he would either end up in their filter or they\u2019d catch him in the morning and dispatch him in an appropriate manner.<\/p>\n

\"Kirstin<\/a>
Kirstin & Rocky<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Kirstin decided to stay till Maria got home \u2013 but by 4am I was pretty much sozzled and ready for the sack and since Kirstin had dropped back below the legal alcohol limit, she decided it was probably best that she take Rocky home.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve no idea what time Maria finally got home, but I arose at 12:30, much the worse for wear and she emerged about an hour later. She\u2019d apparently been woken by her friend Molly, who happens to be a doctor, she\u2019d called to check on her wellbeing. Maria answered that she must be still drunk because she felt like a beer \u2013 Molly said \u201cBeauty, I\u2019ll be round in 20 minutes!\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Maria<\/a>
Maria & Molly<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

So they sat out the back, drinking beer and wine and smoking cigarettes all afternoon \u2013 I was beginning to get tempted when I was called in to work for 3 hours. So that was the sad end to my weekend \u2013 I got home and the place was dark and quiet, so I nuked some cold Chinese and watched telly.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I finish work at lunchtime this Friday \u2013 it\u2019s the annual St Patrick\u2019s Day Golf Tournament, which means returning home plastered at around 6pm to watch the opening round of the 2008 Rugby League Footy competition\u2026\u2026Bring it on, I say\u2026\u2026..<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

COWS, CANE TOADS, CHICKENS AND CHICKS (12.3.2008) Well it\u2019s been just over a month now, since Maria moved in to my joint and it\u2019s been interesting, to say the least. She\u2019s a great girl and we still get-on magnificently \u2013 though so far, our opinions only match on two subjects \u2013 abortion and the fact … Continue reading Cows, Cane Toads, Chickens and Chicks<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-169","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5K3B8-2J","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/169","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=169"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/169\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":201,"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/169\/revisions\/201"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=169"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=169"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.onthewallaby.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=169"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}